Hashtag Single

EP 43: THE INTERSECTION OF FEMINISM + DATING | Teresa Thomas, M.S.

Have you ever struggled with reconciling the equality you want in a relationship and the empowerment you have in your life with dating online? 

.... Okay - that sentence might have just blown your mind a little bit.  But in this episode I'm joined by life & relationship coach Teresa Thomas, M.S, who's here to tell us that the way we identify ourselves and the things we want don't have to be mutually exclusive.  As a person who identifies as a Black feminist, she understands that society can often make you choose between your identities and your desires, but dating can be inclusionary and can uphold your individuality... if you make space for it and know how to look for what you want.

This episode is chock full of such beautiful inspirational wisdom and it's our honor to have Theresa as our guest for Black History Month... yeah that's right, we chose to celebrate Black History Month over Valentine's Day on #single and we couldn't be happier about it. 

Put on your big girl panties, it's time to get your feminism on!

Learn more about Teresa here.

Work with Teresa here.

EP 42: DATING HALF YOUR AGE PLUS SEVEN

Be honest:  what's your age on your dating profile?  Now, be even more honest: what's the age range you're looking for?  Is it your own age, plus or minus five years, or are you consistently looking for people younger than you?

 

My 1:1 guest this month, Grace, has an amazing range she's open to - guys ten years younger AND guys ten years older... which means she can potentially match with guys in their late 20's or even in their 50's, and you'd be surprised how much the kinds of dates differ between the two.  

 

If Grace's voice sounds familiar to you, it's because she's been on #single before - last January Grace joined us as a Guest Expert!  Grace is a fantastic online dating specialist and coach at agoodfirstdate.com, and she's also single, so as a coach she really gets what it's like to be out there swiping in COVID and she shares some of her own insights from dating virtually in 2020 in this episode  

 

Aaaaannddd... drumroll please!  Grace has very kindly created a super special offer for #single listeners!  If you feel like you could benefit from some of Grace's wisdom you're in luck.  She's offering a FREE 30 min coaching session with her to the first five listeners - yes, you read that right, so hurry up and respond ASAP using this link: bit.ly/singlepodcastGrace

 

We can't wait for you guys to connect - let us know how it goes!!

BONUS EP: #single x GIRL AND THE GOV

BONUS EPISODE!!  With this month's inauguration and allllll the intense politics of this month and the past year (woof), we wanted to bring you a bonus mash-up episode with two very awesome ladies who host innovative political podcast Girl and The Gov, who just so happen to be single :).  Sammy and Maddie created Girl and The Gov podcast to provide a platform for young women to engage with the evolving political sphere in an approachable, digestible, and accessible way.  We're super on board with highlighting women in the political space and all for establishing a place to amplify female voices.

 

And since these badasses are single, we thought it'd be cool to exchange ideas about the intersection of dating and politics - like, when is it okay to introduce politics on a date (or better yet, how it possible not to, given everything?).  How do you screen for values that might not align with your own... and can you even match with someone with opposing views in today's culture, or is it just too divisive?  

 

If you're politics-curious and want to dip your toe in, Sammy and Maddie's podcast is such a great resource for those who want transparency and facts given to you in your own language.  Can't wait for these women to take over the world... and maybe even go on a decent date or two :).  

 

Find out more about them here.

Follow them here.

Listen here on apple podcasts

EP 41: SINGLE. THAT DOES NOT MEAN... | Acamea Deadwiler

Prepare to be showered by the goddess wisdom of Acamea Deadwiler, accomplished writer and author of "Single. That: Dispelling the Top Ten Myths of the Single Woman" which we're officially claiming as the #single podcast manifesto!!  

 

Ever been called lonely, desperate, sexually frustrated, bitter?  Chances are you've been labelled or accused of at least one of these things one time or another - just because you're single.  What's up with that?  Why does our culture make such negative assumptions about us because we're not partnered up?  Acamea and I get deep into our introspection and analysis of the things in our society that have allowed single stereotypes to perpetuate and dismantle them one by one.  If you need 45 minutes with a strong, intelligent, inspiring female author to set you up right for 2021, this episode is for you.

 

Learn more about Acamea here.

Buy SINGLE. THAT on Amazon here: 

Or support female, black-owned NYC indie bookstore The Lit. Bar by buying it here.

EP 40: THE DATING APP TIME WARP

If you've ever felt frustrated or out-of-sync with the speed which your matches want to move, you're SO not alone.  The timing of everything - from when to move off the app, when to trust someone with your phone number, when to meet up, and when you're ready to send sexy texts/ pics doesn't just vary from person to person, it seems like it varies greatly between men and women. 

My guest Jessica and I discuss why is it that men seem to want to talk to you like you're their girlfriend when they haven't yet put in the time or effort to even meet you.  We also check in with our VOP Karl who's over in England to talk about his experience with different speeds on both sides, and how long distance relationships come into play in this whole equation. 

If you've ever been called "sweetheart" before you're someone's actual sweetheart, this episode's for you... and be sure to stay tuned to our thirty-minute mark, where Jeanette shares an audio surprise you won't want to miss! :) 

EP 39: ISO: BUSINESS PARTNER FOR LOVE | April Davis

When it comes to dating apps, are you winging it?  Swiping right with abandon or whenever someone seems cute or sane enough to have a conversation with?  That might be a good starting point but you may find that ultimately there's not enough to sustain you, and that's because you're not dating strategically.

April Davis is the founder/ president of Luma, a privately-owned matchmaking firm with 40 locations across the US.  A certified life coach as well, she coaches her clients on the one thing she sees that's missing in today's dating culture: value and goal-based dating.

Plus, she shares with us her tips on how to negotiate the emotional minefield of being single during the holidays!! 

Don't miss this final guest expert episode in our matchmaking series.  We've had a blast getting to know all these incredible women and we hope it's illuminated the process and made you curious about working with a matchmaker in 2021.  Let us know how it goes!

Learn more about April here.  To join the Luma database, click here.

EP 38: POWER COUPLE DREAMS

Picture this:  it's a bright, warm, Hallmark-movie day... you're out running errands (with your mask on, natch), popping in to the post office and dashing off to Trader Joe's when you decide on a quick coffee stop... where you spot a cutie waiting for his oat milk latte.  Your eyes meet across the room.  He smiles (or at least... his eyes kinda crinkle above his mask)... you smile... and then... and then what?

 

Not exactly sure what comes next cause that just doesn't happen to you?  We're in the same boat.  How many times has anyone actually ever had a "meet-cute"?  Certainly it's been harder to do in Covid.

 

Our guest Sarah is a master at the meet-cute, but is struggling on the apps cause guys just don't seem to be seeking the thing she's looking for, which is: brains.  In this time of isolation and virtual connection is it easier or harder to connect intellectually?  We ask our VOP Michael to weigh in on whether men fantasize about being a power couple as much as smart women do.  

 

If you're a woman bored of being called "Gorgeous" (capitalizaton intentional) and asked about your weekend instead of what you're reading, you'll love this episode where we discuss relationships that leave a mark and why you should never go out with a guy who picks you up at a gas station.

 

EP 37: PREPARE TO SHARE YOUR BAGGAGE | Three Day Rule

What's your "baggage"?  Divorced, STIs, single mom of three kids, intimacy issues?  Our two experts - Michael Naisteter and Jaime Bernstein - are pro matchmakers from company Three Day Rule with backgrounds in sex positivity/ education and coaching the transition from co-parenting to single parenting.  They share their wisdom & insight with us on how to hurdle the barrier of facing your scary perceived baggage with someone new by knowing your value and doing the prep work needed to have these kinds of conversations.  As Jaime says,

"Part of being an adult and being able to grow and move forward and have successful interactions and relationships is having difficult conversations that are awkward and are uncomfortable, so I think you have to stop hiding behind the excuse that it's too scary.  Your life will be better on the other side once you face that fear."

If you agree that these positive ladies are just the bees knees and want them in your life, sign up for a profile at https://www.threedayrule.com/work_with_us.

Learn more about Michal here

Learn more about Jaime here

EP 36: HEALTHY, ADULT DATING

Did you ever get to that point in a relationship where your higher, smarter, grown self just sorta knew that you had to walk away cause it wasn't working out?  Not because you didn't love the person, but because a part of you could see that they weren't willing to work on their shit (while you've been working on yours all this time) and you knew that without that link, the problem wouldn't fix itself.    

It takes a GROWN-ASS WOMAN to truly know her whole self, and know her full value to walk away from what's not working.  Cause this dating stuff isn't for the birds.  It challenges you in ways you never thought possible.  And it teaches you too, about what you like and don't like, about what's important to you and what's a dealbreaker.  My guest Lindsey will inspire the heck out of you to take a deeper look at what you need, what triggers you, and what you ultimately deserve so that you approach dating from the happiest, healthiest place possible. :) 

EP 35: INVEST YOURSELF FULLY | Tammi Pickle

Excited to bring you our third episode in our Meet a Matchmaker Series!  Meet Tammi Pickle, VP and Partner of Elite Connections Matchmaking Agency which has been a female-founded, family-based (we're talking Tammi's mom!) company matchmaking singles since allllll the way back in 1994!!!  That's right - from matching by snail mail into the digital age, Elite has now grown up to thirteen (!) offices nationwide and internationally.  If that isn't a success story of female vision, leadership and badassery, I don't know what is. 

Tammi shares with us her insider knowledge from working with and around her mom since 2000, including whether dating in the US is harder than in other countries, how to become a priority and not an option, and leaves us with her top three "Don'ts" for dating in 2020.  If you're thinking about working with a matchmaker or even if you just wanna join their massive database, you can check them out at www.eliteconnections.com to speak to Tammi or one of her associates.  Tell them #single sent you and for goddsakes tell us what happens!!!